Save Marriage Advice From Someone Celebrating 10th Wedding Anniversary

Save Marriage Advice – 6 Tips To A Lasting Relationship

I believe today, 5th December 2009, is the best time for me to write this article because we are celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary. 10 years is not a short period to have spent with someone, especially since ours was not a sudden marriage. We dated for over 11 years before we got married. Don’t get me wrong, we are still relatively young; we are not even 40 yet! Wow! Can’t believe we’ve come so far together! We have a lot of happy days together, especially since the arrival of our beautiful pair of twins two years ago.

However, our relationship is not without its fair share of problems. We do have our ups and downs too. In fact, we strongly believe that if a couple does not have any disagreements between them, then they are in a very dangerous position because it is through these differences that couples get to understand each other more.

Nobody is perfect so if any couple never disagrees, chances are they are both bottling up everything in their hearts and do not communicate with each other. It is some sort like a dormant volcano; it is not dead but when it does erupt one fine day, it will be a very enormous eruption and the relationship might be non-repairable by then. So we feel that having some arguments in a relationship is very healthy.

The most important point to note is that after the disagreement, both parties must come to a compromise. Unless there is no more love existing between the couple, otherwise they must find a way to resolve their differences. This is especially so if there are kids involved. A family where the parents are constantly screaming and shouting at each other is never a healthy environment for young children to grow up in.

I want to express my heartfelt gratitude to my husband for always being there for me in all the ups and downs that we face. We have enjoyed our lives together and especially since we have our twins. In fact, we enjoy each other’s company even though we spend practically 24 hours together each day as we are partners in our offline business. Our friends often wonder at our ability to live with each other without pulling each other’s hair out! So I have decided that today is the most appropriate day to share our marriage tips – how to ensure a long lasting relationship.

1. Open communication
I have listed this as the first tip because without an open communication, all emotions will be bottled up in our hearts. That is very unhealthy. Your partner needs to know whether you are happy or upset about something. You don’t have to scream at each other but let the other party how you feel. In fact, we have been together for so long that we can tell when the other party is happy or upset about something and that is when we will sit and talk about it.

2. Learn to give and take
Life is short so there is no point bearing grudges. If you are upset about something, thrash out the differences, then forget about the whole incident. As couples, we make it a point that we do not let any unhappy matters last overnight.

3. Share out the responsibilities
Unless you have a domestic helper at home, otherwise the housework and other household responsibilities should be shared between both parties. If only one person is doing all the housework, especially if both are holding full time jobs, there will be lots of grievances. Share out the housework so that the job can be done faster and both of you can get to enjoy some time together.

4. Go through all obstacles together
It is vital that you support each other and be there to see each other through any obstacle. There is bound to be problems that you or your spouse face, be it financial, social, etc. Being there for your spouse will mean so much for him because it shows that you care. Having someone to support you also makes the obstacle an easier task to handle.

5. Lend a listening ear
Be willing to listen. Many married couples, especially after they have kids, forget that their spouse also has needs and also needs attention. If your spouse is unable to find care and concern from you, who is he going to turn to for support? Your guess is as good as mine! Thus, if you do not want your spouse to stray, be the ready shoulder for him to cry on. In fact, that was our old time favorite song back during our dating years; Tommy Page’s “A Shoulder To Cry On”. That song is our pledge to remain supportive for each other.

6. Saying ‘I Love You’
This is another common mistake made by married couples, especially so if they have been married for many years – they forget to say ‘I Love You’. Expressing your love for each other is just as essential after marriage as when you were still dating. You have to let your spouse know that you still love him. We make it a point to say it at least once each day.

Above are some simple tips that I’m sure everybody knows but they may not be applying them to their marriage life. It is not difficult to keep the fire going in your relationship but it requires effort from both parties. My hubby and I have been in love for over 21 years. Who says childhood love does not last? We are good role models!